A Treatise on Misunderstandings
by GundamWingFanatic90
Summary: Post Return of the King. A panic arises when Legolas' horse returns home without him on it, but all is not as it seems. PG 13 for Elf bashing. ...No, really!


_**A Treatise on Misunderstandings submitted 6-20-07.**_

_**Okay, here I am with another Lord of the Rings fic. I had just finished reading one of my favorite Legolas torture stories of all time (though I can't for the life of me remember which one it was at the moment) and I had the sudden notion that, whenever Legolas' or Aragorn's or the Twins' horse(s) return with out them, something bad happens and everyone is sent into an uproar. Thus sprang this fic.**_

_**It's one of many in the Tolkien genre, but I hope that you won't mind reading yet another one of them. I hope you like it. I certainly did!**_

_**Summary: A panic arises when Legolas' horse returns home without him on it, but all is not as it seems. PG-13 for Elf bashing. ...No, really!**_

**_Disclaimer: Sadly, I own nothing of the great works of Mister J.R.R. Tolkien. This, unfortunately, concludes The Lord of the Rings and any characters mentioned therein._**

* * *

**_A Treatise on Misunderstandings.  
By GundamWingFanatic90.  
Submitted: 6-20-07.  
Time: 30 Minutes._**

* * *

A foul curse flew through the air as the producer of said expletive glared at the needle that she had been sewing with. 

The Lady Thranduilion was a fair elleth that prided herself on her abilities as many things, but definitely not on her skills as a seamstress. In fact, she had previously hated even the thought of picking up a needle and thread, or a crocheting hook, or a pair of knitting needles. However, as she glowered at the offending item, a gentle kick to the inside of her belly made her smile and remember just why she had taken on the grueling task of making a quilt.

Yes, this baby's quilt would be special, indeed.

Suddenly finding herself thirsty, the lady stood and walked towards the kitchens, intent on getting herself a drink of juice. However, a commotion from the courtyard stopped her, her eyes alighting on a familiar white horse… that was missing his rider. Lady Thranduilion paled drastically, clutching a hand to her bosom, where a pendant that her husband had made for her rested between her breasts.

"Milady!" cried one of her husband's friends, catching sight of her. She brushed them off, moving down to the stallion, skirts hitched up in her hand for better movement.

"Arod!" she exclaimed, reaching up to the horse's tossing head. "Mellon-nin, mas i Legolas?" Arod tossed his head again. The lady found her heart racing. "Mas i Hîr Legolas, Arod?" Arod neighed and whinnied, his front hooves scuffing the dirt anxiously. She stroked his neck and forehead gently, murmuring soothing things in Sindarin, trying in vain to calm her own nerves, knowing that such panic was not good for the child she carried in her womb. As Arod's panic wore down, she called a guard over.

"Nibinhrivë, collect some of your soldiers and do a search of the area," she commanded. "Arod shall show you the way." To a nearby servant, she said, "Orohil, please get me parchment and a quill! I must write to Aran Aragorn immediately, but I have not the time to go inside in my current state!" The two elves nodded quickly and bowed before hastily moving off to do as they were told. Lady Thranduilion continued to soothe her husband's mount as she fought down the panic that threatened to choke her in its strong grip. Soon Orohil had returned, and handed the lady the quill and parchment. Another elf took Arod's reins from the lady's hand and led him away for feeding and watering before they took him out again.

And so the Lady of Southern Ithilien sat down on the steps of the courtyard and began to write.

* * *

Arwen Undomiel had often found her husband to be a source of pride, embarrassment, amusement, and strength aside from their undying love. But to see such a grim look on his seemingly aged face was something that scared her. 

"Meleth-nin? What is the matter?" she asked, coming to his side to look over his shoulder at the missive he had just received from Ithilien.

"Legolas' horse has returned without him," answered Aragorn. Arwen gasped.

"But he only just set out from here the day before yesterday! Surely he would…?" she began, and then trailed off. "You think that he has been waylaid, do you not?" Aragorn nodded solemnly.

"Aye, and that worries me, for as you know, he was traveling alone," he said. She blanched.

"What if it was a band of orcs?" she exclaimed. Aragorn's frown deepened, making the slight wrinkles on his face seem deeper than they really were. He looked surprisingly like Elrond might look were his features aged twenty years.

"I know it not, Arwen," he admitted. "She says that a search party has been sent out to scour the woods for her husband, but I do not know if Legolas made it that far." He paused, and then his expression became determined. "I am going to find him." Arwen rolled her eyes in an exasperatedly unladylike manner, but Aragorn ignored it.

"Aragorn, you should allow the soldiers to do this…" He turned a stern look on his wife.

"Arwen, you know as well as I that I cannot just sit by whilst my best friend, nay, my brother, may be in danger!"

"Aye, but that does not mean that you should risk yourself needlessly! You know that Legolas would not want you to!"

"I am not going to stand by and let someone else do the dirty work when my family and friends are involved!"

"Fine! Then I am going with you!" This caused Aragorn to bite off the counter that he had been about to say and stare at his wife for a second.

"…Arwen, I cannot let you do this!" She crossed her arms, already moving towards their chambers.

"You cannot make me stay, Aragorn," she told him. "Legolas is my friend, as well, and if you are going to go searching for him, then I shall accompany you." She entered their bedroom, Aragorn trailing behind, and began searching through her wardrobe for a suitable set of riding clothes. "And you can no longer use the excuse that if we both die then the kingdom will be without leaders once again. Eldarion is no longer a child, and is ready to take the throne should something happen to us. You cannot dispute this. I am going." Having been thoroughly rebuffed before he had even begun to argue his point, Aragorn stared at his wife for a moment before huffing and pulling out a set of his own riding clothes. Pausing only long enough to step into the hall and tell a servant to have the captain of the guard ready a search party, Aragorn donned his travel attire once more.

* * *

The sight that met Aragorn's eyes as they approached the figure in the plains halfway between Minas Tirith and Ithilien would have been funny had he known the entire story at first sight. However, as it was, the sight of Legolas Thranduilion, silver eyes a stormy grey and expression sour, marching towards the Tower of Guard with nary a scratch on him, both bewildered and angered the king. Beside him, Arwen had her eyebrows raised as she took in the sight of her lifelong friend's appearance, from the twitching in his eyebrow to the carefully hidden clenched fists. The Prince of Mirkwood was royally peeved. 

"Suilad, Aragorn, Arwen," called Legolas, being cordial to his friends though he was not in the best of moods. "Have either of you seen Arod around?" Now Aragorn's brow was twitching to match Legolas'.

"Legolas Thranduilion!" the king exclaimed, dismounting and moving with surprising swiftness to his best friend. Legolas turned a puzzled gaze on the former Ranger only to be cuffed around the head. He stared at the king in surprise.

"Do you have any idea the worry you caused when your horse arrived in Ithilien without you?" Aragorn was currently livid. "I received a missive from your wife telling me that Arod had galloped in in a panic yesterday morning bearing no rider! Your wife is worried sick, and you nearly gave me a heart attack from the thought that you had been waylaid!"

"I was waylaid, Estel!" This made the king pause, and then he instantly began double-checking the prince for injuries. Legolas stayed his friend's searching gaze with a shake of the head. "I am not injured or wounded in any way, shape, or form, Estel. Now, if you shall permit me to borrow that horse that I see bears no rider, I shall tell you the tale on our way to Ithilien. It is closer, and I've no doubt that you shall want to see my lady wife's reaction to me being home and unharmed."

* * *

Aragorn and Arwen were staring at Legolas in disbelief, their mouths slightly open, as the party rode into the courtyard of the keep in Ithilien two hours later. Then, as the prince dismounted, the king began to laugh uproariously at the tale he had been told. Legolas simply rolled his eyes with a faint blush of embarrassment, graciously helping a giggling Arwen to dismount. 

"I am glad to see that you think that my plight was funny, mellon-nin," said Legolas. "Next time you shall be the one to suffer it!"

"Suffer what, my dear husband?" came a deceptively calm voice from the stairs. Legolas turned to see his lovely wife standing at the top, radiant in a white gown and a hand laid on her greatly swollen belly. Her eyes, however, were narrowed, the only sign of her anger.

"Mae govannen, meleth-nin," Legolas said. The Lady Thranduilion was decidedly not happy with her husband's off-hand manner, and she beckoned him towards her with one hand.

"You shall come with me to the parlor so that we may discuss this. Lord Aragorn and Lady Arwen, you are more than welcome to join us, but I warn you, it will not be pleasant to your ears." Aragorn and Arwen exchanged looks before each took a hold of one of Legolas' arms.

"Nay, my lady, we shall aid you!" they said, chuckling. Legolas glowered at his two friends.

"Traitors…" he muttered, loud enough for only them to hear. They only laughed more.

* * *

"So, would you care to tell me of your adventure before I tear into you, hervenn-nin?" asked the Lady Thranduilion, her voice a sibilant whisper as she stared her husband down. 

"Yes, actually, I would," retorted Legolas, still in a rather foul mood. He was cuffed gently upside the head by Aragorn in response to his lack of manners, but after a brief glare at his best friend, he looked back at his wife.

"Then, pray tell, why did your horse come back in a panic without you?"

"It started the first night after I left Minas Tirith to come back here," began Legolas, ignoring his wife's icy stare. "I had just set up camp when suddenly I became aware of the fact that there was a rustling in the bushes. I pulled out my knives, ready to defend myself, but I was still caught completely by surprise when I was jumped on by not one, but six bodies." The lady's eyes narrowed further, not entirely convinced. Legolas continued, unheeding of her reaction.

"Arod immediately bolted, as I had told him to do should I be waylaid. Unfortunately, my 'attackers' were a group of six hunting dog pups. They were completely harmless, really, but still left me without a horse. So I deemed to come back to Ithilien on foot the next day. As you know, it is almost a day's walk from the halfway point between Minas Tirith and Ithilien, and by the time that Aragorn and Arwen and their company came upon me, it was already late morning today."

"And how do I know that this is not just some elaborate prank that you all decided to pull on me to see my reaction?" Aragorn, Arwen, and Legolas stared at his wife incredulously, and the prince opened his mouth to defend himself. However, he did not even manage to speak one word before a gaggle of brown fur and waggling tongues hurtled through the door of the parlor and jumped on the blonde elf, knocking him over onto the rug and causing the king and queen of Gondor to laugh uproariously. For a second, Lady Thranduilion stared disbelievingly at the six puppies that had currently reduced her husband to a chuckling ball on the floor, and then she sank back into her chair, her jaw agape.

"Well, never mind, then…"

Needless to say, Lady Thranduilion was convinced after that.

* * *

**_END._**

* * *

**_Mellon-nin, mas i Legolas? - My friend, where is Legolas?  
Mas i Hîr Legolas, Arod? - Where is Lord Legolas, Arod?  
Suilad - Greetings  
Mae govannen, meleth-nin - Well met, my love  
Hervenn-nin - My husband_**

**_I left Legolas' wife nameless on purpose, just so that you know. I know that there are many Legolas fans out there who have their own OCs who would like nothing more than for those OCs to be Legolas' wife or other consort, and, as I have my own OC such as that (though I have not mentioned her this far in any of my stories), I know that I would not want to see any other person with him. Thus, I purposefully left out her name and physical description, save for her being pregnant. _****_As for the sewing part at the beginning, I figure that, because pregnant women and ellyth can be temperamental at times, she would be frustrated if the needle kept pricking her and even go so far as to say that she hated and/or never wanted to sew, even if she truthfully did like embroidery._**

**_Thus my explanation._**

**_By the way, I got the two servants' names from the Barrow-Downs name generator because I was rushing, needed names, and felt lazy. The names do not really mean anything, I think._**

**_Hope you liked it, and, as always, I would be very happy if you dropped a review. In the immortal words of William Turner, "A craftsman is always pleased to hear that his work is appreciated", or something along those lines. I appreciate feedback so that I can improve my writing style. Thanks so much, and until then, navaer!_**

**_-Fanatic_**


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